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Monday, July 12, 2010


Well, Wes found a job.  I think that's a good thing since he's been unemployed for almost a year now (the end of July last year).  I know we needed him to find a job, the only thing is... it's an hour and a half away.  He will be living with his brother during the week and at home on the weekends.  We have done this before but it was short term, now this is long term, no less than a year. I will not pack up and leave my hometown, uproot my child for a new job, when he had not kept a job for more than 2 years since we met. 

He has always worked, but never in the same place.  What I mean is, when he was young he was a mechanic for a dealership, but right before his 21 birthday (maybe right after it) he got a DUI and could no longer work on cars because he couldn't test drive them.  Since then he's become a plumber, a very good one and he has his own plumbing license.  He has jumped from plumbing company to plumbing company since we met.  Partly because they have to go where the work is, partly because he decides he doesn't like this person or the way that person does things, and  partly because they close down.  The point is that in the last 11 years that I've know him he has not stayed with one company more than 1 maybe 2 years.  I can't uproot for a potential job, that he may quit or leave or be unhappy within 6 months.  Does that make me a bad wife?

I think that we can do this,  we have a strong relationship, we have always "made" it financially.  I'm tired of just "making" it.  I want to MAKE IT.  I dont' want to " be fine" I want to succeed.  I was enrolled in college, but now we can't afford the classes, and I NEED to finish my degree.

In his defence I've not been much better.  I did own my own dance studio for 5 years before that I worked for another dance studio for 3 years and for an accountant during that time for 3 years.  (I worked 2 jobs before Cam was born)  the dance studio wan only a few hours a week, but there I made MORE than my other job.  But since then, the last 6 years I've had 7 jobs.  One wrote bad checks, 2 were selling insurance and I did that for 3 years with 2 different companies and I sucked at both of them, a job with a title loan company that only last 2 months, and I've been with the place I work now for2 years.  I like it there, but there is no room for growth.  I want to find a place to work that I can become something else, have some benefits, get a raise sometimes. I was supposed to work here while I finished school, now it's been a year since Wes worked and I've not taken classes since Christmas. I guess I'm frustrated, my life is not where I pictured it would be at this age.  I feel like I have nothing to show for my years of work. 

Anyway I am praying that this job is a good job, a lasting job and one that he will quickly master.

Sorry for the rambling.


Amber said...

Congrats on the new job. It's definitely difficult out there right now and a lot of people are having to live seperated for a little while to make it. I'm sure you two will be great!

Tiffany said...

Ugh. That is rough. I know exactly what you mean by wanting to MAKE it. We are in the exact same place. Keep strong. You guys can do it, you can make it. My hubs & I keep reminding each other that, someday, we will be in a place to bless another young couple going through the exact same struggles. And we will understand their frustrations.

Rachel said...

It's so hard being between long-term decisions! I hope you both are able to find good fits for you and be in a place that is what you all want.

Have a great day!