I Love Comments!

Friday, March 5, 2010

How do you help someone you dont know?

Many years ago (to be exact - 14 years ago this past November) I lost my best friend. She was so one of a kind. She was temperamental, and sometimes moody. She liked to gossip and lay out in the sun. She was kinda of boy crazy - particularly over this one boy. She was no saint, she didn't preach to crowds, and she didn't read her bible everyday (not to my knowledge anyway), but she went to church, she prayed, she was saved by the blood of Jesus and the grace of God! She was far from perfect. What she was though, she was a great friend. The kind of friend that would always be there if you needed her, she was as close to her mom as I am to mine. She was the kind of friend that you could grow apart from, then pick up right where you left off. She was honest about how she felt, and make no mistake if she didn't like you (or your boyfriend) you would know it right off. She got sick just two months after my 20th birthday. She was still 19 years old. She died shortly after turning 20. It was hard to say the least. Sometimes I still hear her voice, I can almost guess what she would say in certain situations. I miss her so much. That is the most painful memory I have, that time in my life was the hardest thing that I have ever been through.

Anyway, last September we were on the way home from the beach when my mother in law called. She was very upset. My nephew (my brother in law's son), was on his way home to his mother's house. His parents are divorced and he rides a train from the town he lives in with his mom to the town his dad lives every other weekend. His mom called his dad just a few minutes after the train had left, to tell him that they had found her sister and brother in law dead. They had been murdered. My nephew was VERY close to these people. He loved them both very much. We were all very worried about JC because his dad just divorced his step-monster (really), so he had lost "her" and her children that he loved very much. Now his favorite aunt and uncle. We knew this was going to be hard for him.

His mother V is taking this really hard. She lost her sister - her best friend. I don't know his mother, but I do know that she is a great mother. She loves her son, and would do anything for him. I know this because I can see in his face how very much he loves his mom.

Since her sisters death, V has shut down. JC has missed so much school he is going to fail his grade, and he told me that his mom stays in her room all the time and doesn't come out. JC is moving in with my brother in law this weekend.

I want so badly to help V. I want to tell her that I do understand, I know that she is hurting, I know she lost her sister/best friend. But at this point JC lost his favorite aunt, favorite uncle AND his mom. His mom is lost to him because she is grieving so much. She has to move on, get over it and start to heal. How do you help someone that you don't know? How do you reach out to a stranger because you love their child soooo much?

1 comment:

Amy B. said...

What a tragic story...I am so sorry!...and, thank you for your prayers on our behalf and for sweet Sage's family...these moments are so tough to get through and it's nice to know that we have people thinking of us!